Day 1: The Easiest, Hardest Day

The start to day one of keto matched the vision in my head – no work, and tons of time and mental energy to figure things out. I took the day off for a doctors appointment, and a much needed 3 day weekend after several weeks of overtime. Quickly, however, day one matched the reality of most day ones — the feeling like mayyyybe we aren’t so prepared after all.

I started out with bulletproof coffee. It met my expectations. Basically, it’s what happens when you accidentally drop drawn butter into your coffee and decided to drink it anyway. The fat layer on top is slightly unsettling, and when it gets cold, so does your will. Luckily, I’m a long time butter fan. Does it mean it’s good with coffee? Kind of? The coffee I used is Cameron’s Coffee Toasted Southern Pecan, which turned out to be a solid choice. It’s a flavor that implicitly yearns for butter.

Here, it looks like I dropped a greasy egg into my coffee — which I’m sure will be involved in a fad diet in the mid-21st century

I didn’t feel hungry at all. Perhaps it was the pasta leftovers and stout I housed 9pm the night before, in an effort to “clear the fridge.” The coffee carried me through until my mid-afternoon doctor’s appointment. While there, I confessed to my doctor that I started keto.

“Oh. That’s hard.”

She went on to tell me to be mindful of my food intake, since it’s easy to under eat, and make sure to include vegetables. Solid advice to someone who has only consumed greasy coffee. It’s 4pm now, and my mission is to pick up Impossible grounds at Target.

Everyone knows this is a trap.

Meandering through the aisles, I inspected several activewear items, picked out the perfect 10ft phone charging cable, and checked out the book section. Finally, starting with the first grocery aisle, I noted that almost nothing is keto friendly. Meat sticks…stevia soda…broth……nuts! I selected a bag of pistachios then it hit me: I’m starving.

I started whizzing through the aisles, picking up brown mustard and keto ketchup for the bunless Impossible burgers I planned to eat. With renewed purpose, I swung around to the meat aisle. No Impossible. Impossibly sold out. Beyond Burgers scattered about in their designated space. Personally, I don’t care for Beyond. It seems fitting — I only like Impossible.

Deflated, I grabbed a pack of colby jack snack cubes and checked out. Now in my car, slightly cross-eyed, I ripped into the packages. 8 cheese cubes and 6 nuts later, I was like – does this have carbs? I realized I was in trouble.

When I got home, I knew whatever it was I needed to eat, it had to be quick. I put together a simple meal:

  • Arugula, simply dressed with salt, pepper, lemon juice and olive oil, topped with a sliced avocado
  • Shrimp, pan fried with olive oil, butter, garlic and lemon

I ate without any grace whatsover. I ate like a feral street cat who subsists on sporadic handouts from an agoraphobic retiree. It was delicious, and actually filling. I washed it down with grape flavored sparkling water, and later, a delicious Pinot Noir.

To track my macros, I’m using the Lifesum Premium iPhone app. I’m setup on the ketogenic medium plan, which allows for up to 50g of carbs a day (again, I have no time for keto flu). Here’s how I made out:

Not too bad after all, given I’m not too concerned about the calorie limits. It’s actually keto strict, given I’m well under the 20g limit. I’ll have to look into whether my protein intake is a problem from a keto perspective.

My life in a nutshell — the best laid plans, with kind of decent results. Until tomorrow. – Jules

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